Thursday, August 6, 2009

Things I have noticed about animals...

And now for some completely random thoughts...

I like animals for the most part. At one time in my life I had rabbits, a dog, a turtle, hermit crabs, and fish (yes, all at the same time). We are down to a dog, turtle and fewer fish now but I can't imagine having a house with NO animals in it. They are fun and cute, even though they smell sometimes and make more work for me. (And yes I do mean *me*. I was never one of those silly parents who gets a pet because she believes her kids when they say they will care for the creature! I got the animals because I wanted to.)

Anyway...here are some things I believe:

1. Birds are evil. This is a fact and I am sure some of you are not surprised by this statement by me. They are freaky looking with sharp beaks and claws. They can swoop down out of nowhere and attack you, and don't say that won't happen because it does! I have been chased at the beach by seagulls who wanted my soft pretzel. It is the source of much laughter on the part of my children, but it happened. Maybe "The Birds" was fiction...but Hitchcock got the idea somewhere.

2. Dolphins are cool. I didn't want Flipper for a pet when I was a kid. I wanted to BE Flipper. The freedom, the swiftness and the intelligence of dolphins are so interesting. My first tattoo was a dolphin on my ankle just because I think they are so beautiful. I love those stories about them "saving" swimmers...that is cool. I'm not sure if I believe them necessarily, but you don't hear about BIRDS saving lives, do you?

3. Elephants are fascinating. I love the matriarch thing...because really, moms are generally in charge anyway, right? ;-). They live in tight knit family groups and they care for each other. They are intelligent and creatures of habit. If I were ever to start a new collection (after lunchboxes, dolphin stuff and rabbit stuff, I'm done though) it would definitely be elephant stuff.

4. Dogs aren't that smart. They lick their privates, eat grass, leaves and garbage and act like they haven't seen you in 8 years when you've only been gone 15 minutes. They can be cute, but they can also bite your face off if provoked. They relieve themselves in the middle of the floor when they feel like it and they think they own your bed. Of course there is the unconditional love for the most part, that's nice. But again...not so smart because most of us aren't worthy of that.

5. Rabbits are smarter than most people think. I had rabbits for many years. They had no cages and were litter box trained. One rabbit I had came when I called her name, went up and down the stairs, would jump in my lap and nudge me to be petted...very dog-like without the smell, shedding and bed stealing.

6. I would say something about cats but I know a lot of people actually like them, and I don't want to start a whole cat debate. Suffice it to say, I am HIGHLY allergic to them, so they are not my favorite animal. Also, the whole "hide under the bed and swipe at your ankles" thing is highly suspect, in my opinion. I don't trust them. BUT, if I were a witch (which I wish I was with all my little heart) I'd have a black cat. First, I could cast a spell and get rid of my allergies and second because I think it is in the witch charter that you have to have a cauldron and a cat.

Feel free to chime in with your own observations...if you hate animals in general that's fine too, I'm sure you have observations about that!

4 comments:

  1. Dolphins are ultra intelligent. You should see them play in the bow-wake of a warship doing 15kts. at sunset! Amazing.
    BIRDS EVIL? Anthropomorphic misanthrope! and CATS suck, plain and simple. The only thing that sucks worse than cats is cat lovers. There I said it for you...

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  2. I don't have my cauldron anymore but I do finally own a black cat. Infer what you will. *wink

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  3. Well I AM a witch...and I have not one, but TWO black cats!! ( Plus 5 white ones, since one of mine just had kittens lol ) and I do have a mini-cauldron...does that count? *winks*

    Some folks just are not cat people. It happens lol. I am a cat person, but after a week of 5 kittens using my legs as a climbing tree, I am about ready to change my opinion lol.

    I love dolphins, and I FULLY agree that birds are freaking evil..I am a redhead..and when I was 10...there was a horrible day, that involved hummingbirds chasing a very traumatized 10 year old redhead girl...and her parents may or may not have been doubled over laughing, therefore were of NO help at all..so I feel ya on that one lol..

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