Things I Have Learned as I've Grown Older...or, er, um, More Mature:

I took a writing break, in case anyone noticed. I've been reading and playing games. Plus, I ran out of ideas. But lately, at work I've been feeling old again. Then one day recently it just hit me like a bird into a window on a sunny day (and isn't that the BEST sound ever??).

I'm NOT old...as I keep telling my brother (who is 7 months younger than I am, you figure it out) I am just moving forward, which is inevitable. And sometimes, not so bad because with maturity comes wisdom...and the breakdown of body tissue, but that's another Note.

There are some things that I have gathered as truths over the decades. You may or may not agree, but if you recall from my more prolific writing time, I don't really care what you think. It. Is. All. About. Me. So, here we go...

1. Throw it away: You will not use it again, wear it again, give it away or find another need for it. If you honestly have something that makes you think, "Oh the kids might want it when they are ", YOU ARE WRONG. Seriously, for example I have every fricking cell phone I ever owned in a drawer in my house. Do the boys want some 5 pound, antenna bound, digital mess that barely fit in my purse, much less my pocket? Of course not....and now what do I do with that crap? I think it might be illegal to throw them away.

2. I have an addictive personality: TAB, soap operas, Facebook, Cafe World (which I blame for my lack of essay writing over the last 8 months). When I do something I do it BIG and all the way. So, I have to be careful what I start cuz ya never know....Meanwhile, if you bop into Cafe World, leave me a tip and send me mystery spices. I'm low on InstaThyme.

3. Less matters: A lot of the kids at work (and by kids I mean the newbies, not the actual children) get all riled up about stuff. I am at the point that I used to scoff at...you know the point where you can say stuff like, "Back in the day," and "In the 90"s", and "It all comes back around full circle...if you stick around long enough you will see." Oy....I hate hearing myself say those things, but it is true. Things could be better, but they could be a hell of a lot worse. It takes time to be able to see the big picture.

4. I don't look that bad: Sometimes I feel bad about my weight, my fake and real syndromes and diseases or my dark roots. There is an instant cure for this...travel an hour north to Wisconsin and look around. We look great this side of the border.

5. You have to take time for yourself: The more experienced in life (lol) you are, the fewer people actually care about your well being. That may sound harsh, but it is true. People who care may be disinterested, busy playing video games or Little League, working 24/7 or even dead. So you have to take time for you. Moms who say, "I don't have time to work out, go out with a friend" etc...aren't trying hard enough. The saying "If Mommy ain't happy, no one is happy" is true. Face it, mom is the captain of the ship. If she is unhappy that ship is sunk. Make time for yourself. Whether it is an hour a day to exercise or watch General Hospital (which is getting really good this month, btw) you need to do that.

6. You can never be up to date with technology: I can try, and I do...but once you buy something, 10 minutes later some update makes it obsolete. I love my ereader. But I think I might need an iPad now. And if you are listening, be sure to tell Tom and my parents that is what I expect for my birthday.

7. Birds and Comcast are evil and they suck. Birds want to peck your eyes out and Comcast wants to steal your money. This will never change no matter how old I get. I am working on learning to accept both. Baby steps...

8. I am not a bad parent: I have seen a lot of kids and a lot of parents over 20 years of teaching...and really, I'm not that bad, so far.

9. You can't worry about everything the news tells you to worry about: Blizzards? Swine flu? Bird Flu? SARS? West Nile virus? Brain tumors from cell phones? If I worried about every single thing that showed up on the 10:00 news I'd be a mess. Now, bird flu may be serious..but at this point if it kills lots of birds first I'm ok with it. Live your life, the news is there for ratings, restaurant reviews and Tracy Butler's soap opera trivia.

10. Be thankful: Things aren't perfect but still, I choose happiness. You can be angry or bitter or pissed off...but that takes a lot of effort. Pick the thing in life that is good-your job, your kids, a hobby and focus on it. Don't focus on the one bad thing, turn it around and attend to the thing that is good. See the glass as half full...it isn't as impossible as it seems.

I'm not Little Mary Sunshine, I'm just being practical. Life is too short to be angry all the time. So...jump in here, folks. What life lesson have you learned? Do share...Remember, I'm running low on creativity here.